Author Archives: Shocki, PhD, LMFT, LCSW

About Shocki, PhD, LMFT, LCSW

Dr Shocki has over thirty years experience in the behavior health field. He has founded and directs the Life Source Center, Inc., located in Plantsville Connecticut. Services include behavior health counseling dealing with relationship issues, persons struggling with various anxiety and depressive maladies and those individuals struggling to develop improved stategies to cope with the world around them. Dr. Shocki has also written a book entitled "Take Charge of Your Life or Someone Else Will" The book is available electronically free upon request at lifesourcecenter @aol.com.
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Barriers to Achieving Positive Change

The following is the first of two blog presentations.  The first, this one, deals with the barriers to achieving positive change.  The second one deals with looking at ways to effectively achieving positive change.

This blog, along with previous blogs written, is based on issues from various patients I have worked with over the years. If you wish to no longer receive these blogs, merely e-mail me at lifesourcecenter@aol.com, stating “Do not email future blogs” and your name will be deleted from the mailing list.

Regardless of the particular professed desire to change one’s behavior, there is a natural propensity to resist the implementation of such changes. Here are some of reasons change may be so hard to achieve.

  • Influences from the past become ingrained. Exposed repetitively, as a child, to negative messages from parents and other authority figures, becomes a habit.  Once a habit is formed, it will naturally defend itself and resist, even change for the better.
  • It’s easier to deal with the known present than an unknown future. The brain is designed to find peace in knowing the predictability of the present. An unknown future creates worry and not feeling in control.  
  • It may mean having to adjust to a new you. Change, even positive change, may result in viewing yourself in a new light. This can lead to not feeling comfortable with the perceived new personality changes. 
  • It will mean giving up secondary gains of staying the same. In order to get something, you may have to give up something.  This is hard to do.
  • Immediate relief outweighs long term benefits. Focus is usually on feeling better as quickly as possible, rather than working toward being better as a lifestyle.
  • The fear of failure is too emotionally crippling. Routinely being put down and humiliated, results in mistakes viewed as a reinforcement of self-doubt rather than viewed as opportunities for growth. 
  • The fear of success is too emotionally crippling. Focus is not on fearing actual success but rather fearing the expectations, demands and new responsibilities success would bring.   

In our next blog, we will attempt to tackle this subject with effective coping strategies and techniques.   

 Readers are invited to comment, share thoughts, ideas or suggestions about this blog or any other previous blogs. Readers can e-mailing me at lifesourcecenter@aol.com or mailing me at Life Source Center, 710 Main Street, Plantsville Connecticut, 06479.