“What we see depends mainly on what we look for.” – John Lubbock

The longer I live in life and the more people I see in treatment, I can honestly say that I never cease to be amazed by the mind’s ability at self deception. I find that people make decisions everyday about others, about themselves  and about the world around them, not at all based on reality but on their own unique perception of what they believe reality to be.

Being open to another experience or another way of looking at people, places or things that is beyond one’s own comfort zone is difficult indeed. There is a tendency to reject a thought or idea that takes us to a new level. Because it is new it becomes strange and foreign and a bit scary.  As a result we gravitate back to the familiar even if it continues not to bring us fulfillment but rather unhappiness.

The answer lies in mustering the courage to begin to be open to the possibility that there may be another, different way to live and be.  This doesn’t have to happen in one fell swoop.  It can happen in small daily ways of getting out of our comfort zone.  It means truly listening to other’s thoughts and ideas and less internal talking to ourselves, repeating the same old outmoded thoughts and ideas that gets us one where but the same old place in time.


It’s amazing what asking questioning and listening will open to us.  It may even get us out of our self deceptive thoughts and ideas about ourselves, others and the world around us.